Five Points for Style
by Zetaseal
Summary: [Slight BalthierxVaan] In which Vaan is the victim of a joke, and Balthier realizes that while he cannot escape his past, he can certainly hide it.


Warning: Unnecessary present tense. Not entirely serious. Spoilers for Balthier's past. Bits of BalthierxVaan, but it turned away from being outright slashy somewhere in the middle.

---

Sometimes it can be hard for Balthier himself to tell when his flirting will be harmless or... harmful. A bit of flattery never hurts when in a compromising position, and his smooth talking has bailed him and Fran out of many close calls. Then again, when his target is so completely dense it can be difficult to predict how it could be taken. A lesson he supposes he should have learned long ago, but now feels too much like eating his words to berate himself for that.

He had only meant to bring that - if he were being honest - rather fetching blush into the boy's cheeks. It's a simple enough task, almost a daily ritual to lighten the mood of the group. All he had said to Vaan as the boy started harping about his dreams to become a sky pirate _again_ was, "I could teach you a thing or two about what sky pirates do."

Maybe it was the unfortunate and accidental rhyming that ruined the tone of the statement. Whatever it was made Vaan take it literally, and from that day forward, ask multiple times a day to learn the tricks of the sky pirate trade. Never one to let a bad situation go to waste, Balthier decided to actually give what he had offered.

"Five points," he says, examining and adjusting his cuffs in the most bored manner he could muster.

"Oh, come _on_! That's at least worth ten!" Vaan whines. He notices Penelo approaching with caution and turns to her. "Don't you think so?"

"Think what? What're you doing, Vaan?" she asks, looking as if she'd rather be anywhere else than caught between Vaan and Balthier. Quite wisely, the pirate thinks.

"I'm earning sky pirate points, of course!" The thief puffs out his chest, taking a strange pride in his work. "I cleaned up the cockpit, and that's worth ten points!"

"Five," Balthier counters lazily, keeping the grin from his face with practice. "Take what you can get."

Vaan scuffs the floor irritably. Penelo turns to Balthier puts her hands on her - admittedly fine - hips. "You're awful!" she scolds.

"Well, I guess it's okay. I'm up to fifty now, so soon I'll get to help with repairs!" Vaan says, as changeable as sunlight on water and completely ignoring Penelo. "I don't actually get to repair anything, but I get to watch and supply the tools!"

"I don't see what's so awful about it. It keeps him busy, doesn't it?" Balthier says with a wink for Penelo.

"What's so awful about it is he thinks this is completely serious! There's no such thing as - as 'sky pirate points!'" she insists.

"There's no such thing?" Vaan asks, looking as devastated as if he had just been told he would never, ever receive another hug for the rest of his natural life.

"Who do you think would know, her or I? In fact," he says, "Fran!" Wherever she is, he knows she can hear with her impressive set of ears. Soon she pokes her head out the door of the _Strahl_ and looks down at them all inquiringly. "Fran, Penelo here seems to have come under the misconception that there is not, in fact, any such thing as sky pirate points."

She pauses. Balthier wonders if she'll play along. "Of course there are," she says simply.

"There you go," he says, and Penelo forgets for a moment to be angry in light of Fran, of all people, joining in this extended joke on Vaan. "Do you think I just let Fran be my partner as soon as I met her? She had to earn her points, too."

_That_ was as far as the viera was willing to go; she turns around and retreats into the _Strahl_, shaking her head almost imperceptibly. It's getting harder for Balthier to keep his straight face; he hopes Penelo will drop it soon, especially after Vaan gets wide-eyed. "Really? So, so, I could -"

"No," Balthier cuts in smoothly. "Besides, you're only at fifty. A paltry sum compared to Fran's total, and nowhere near what you need to earn to get to _that_ status. You don't even rank enough for apprentice."

"But you said you'd teach me something about what sky pirates do!" Vaan complained, gesticulating wildly.

"Would you still like me to teach you a few... tricks?" Balthier asked with a quirk of one brow. Penelo, who had been approaching him angrily, stopped with a squeak. At least _some_one was understanding this, even if his intended target was incurably foolish.

"Yes! That's what I've been saying!"

"Vaan," Penelo says with a sigh, pink coloring her cheeks. She seems to decide this is all that's necessary and falls silent again. He can just see the inner battle - let this continue at their own risk, or inform Vaan that his naïveté is what got him into this mess. Neither one seemed to be particularly appealing to her. "Just don't work too hard, okay?" she finally says, though it seems almost painful to get out. Vaan beams.

"Don't worry about me! I can handle it," he says as she leaves, most likely to where Basch is being silent and moody off to the side and thankfully out of earshot.

"I certainly hope so," Balthier can't help but add, loud enough for Penelo to overhear. He wishes he could see her face, but contents himself with the knowledge that it is probably priceless.

"So what next? What else can I do?" Vaan asks excitedly, rushing up to Balthier's perch upon a crate, stopping at the outstretched hand. Not in range for him to touch, unfortunately, but it also reminds him how he got into this mess into the first place. He makes a mental promise to himself to buy Vaan a shirt, however much he may enjoy the boy's well-muscled chest.

"Perhaps you should listen to your girl and take a rest. We leave early tomorrow, so don't wear yourself out now," Balthier says wearily, realizing that even if Vaan isn't tiring, _he_ is. "Sky pirates know when to stop," he adds, knowing the boy gobbles up these infrequent tidbits of sky pirate 'rules,' and hopes he'll heed this one. "If you keep pestering me for work, I may just have to... deduct points."

"Oh, all right, I guess I can take a break," Vaan said, looking disappointed. Instead of leaving Balthier in peace, as was the desired effect, he hops onto an adjacent crate, kicking his feet out childishly. "Can I ask you something?"

"Well, you obviously have the ability as you already have." Seeing this go straight over Vaan's head, the pirate shakes his head and continues. "Yes, Vaan, you may ask me a question."

"Do you have any family?"

Long practice is the only thing that keeps him from sputtering. "Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering," Vaan says, his feet thumping against the crate in an even rhythm. Something in the back of his mind reminds Balthier that the boy is an orphan.

"Wondering what my family thinks of my high-flying and philandering ways?" he hazards.

"Does that mean being a sky pirate?" Balthier nods with gravity. "Yeah, that's what I want to know."

"Never get the chance to confess your aspirations to your parents, eh?" He takes the pause to be an affirmative. "Well, it's no good asking me. As far as you're concerned, I don't have any family."

"'As far as I'm concerned?'" Vaan parrots. "What does _that _mean? You won't tell me?"

"Let me put it this way. No one just one day informs their parents that they wish to not be good, law-abiding citizens but to be career criminals. You will not meet many pirates with close ties to their families, if they have one at all."

"Wait, so you do have a family, but you don't see them?"

"... I suppose, yes." This is quickly getting into dangerous territory; Balthier wants nothing more than to be done with this conversation before he ends up confessing the identity of his father. He knows someday soon they will meet again, but he sees no reason to inform anyone of their relationship unless necessary. And telling Vaan at this moment certainly does not qualify as necessary.

"Why don't you keep in contact with them?" To his surprise, Vaan sounds personally offended that Balthier is estranged from his parents. "They can't be so disappointed in you that they'd never want to see their own son again..."

"They can be, and they are," Balthier says, barely keeping the bitterness out of his voice. "Besides, I'm sure your parents were quite nice and caring and all that. My father qualifies as 'none of the above.'" He needs to change the topic, quickly, before he divulges more information, however tempting it is. "While you can't tell your parents about it, you have a sort of surrogate family, don't you? You have that bangaa in Rabanastre and, of course, your girl." He wonders how many times he will have to refer to Penelo as such before he understands that Vaan is out of his reach. He also wonders what it will take to finish this conversation, and hopes he's on the right track. "You can't forget that. So long as they don't actively try to stop you, you can say they as good as approve."

"I guess," Vaan mumbles. Balthier thinks he should do something comforting, but before he can force himself to move Vaan hops off of his crate. "Thanks, Balthier. I think I'll go get some supplies for tomorrow," he adds abruptly, running out of the Aerodrome with Penelo tagging after, calling out to him.

Balthier sighs as Fran approaches, not looking at her but hearing the unmistakable _click-click_ of her boots. "It's not polite to eavesdrop."

"What makes you think I was listening?"

"Perhaps because you can't _not_ listen," he replies, making a vague gesture to her ears. She merely looks down at him. "Our travels will take us to Archadia, no doubt about that. I wonder, will they see me in the same way once they find out I was born there? That my father is the infamous head of the Draklor Laboratory, and personal friend of Vayne?"

"At first, they may object. But they will remember soon after how you have never once shown any sign of sympathy towards your homeland," she points out. "They are not so blinded by hatred that they would turn on a loyal companion."

All Balthier says is, "If you think so." Somehow, he doubts the more impulsive member of their little group would be so logical. He doubts Vaan would be quick to forgive the son for the sins of the father. Looking out through the archways leading out to Bhujerba, their temporary resting spot, out to where the boy and his girl had run off, he doubts it would be worth it to tell them, anyway.

----

I have to apologize to Acerbitas. After seeing the term 'sky pirate points' in her fic The First Rule (which you should all go read), I fell into gigglefits and then wrote this. So, um, this is all your fault - I mean, I'm so terribly sorry for, erm, borrowing.


End file.
